I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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