Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
