i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Dear god my vagina.
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