We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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