No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
