I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Randomize
