Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize