At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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