After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize