Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize