he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
