Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
