i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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