Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize