I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
