Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
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