i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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