Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize