He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
