I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
