Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Randomize
