he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
