The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
