found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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