I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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