I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
