yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
