their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize
