All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
