Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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