Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
