oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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