I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
