Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
