big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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