at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
