I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
