apparently the secret to your success is patron
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
