Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
