Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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