Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize