We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
