I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize