we have officially lost it.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
