I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
