I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
