I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize