It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I have aggressive nipples.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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