420 ftw
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Randomize
