worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
